new army diary(the tour of belfast)

well i managed to make it through my wee jail sentance in osnabruck wae ma face intact,arrived back in bunde camp and told to settle down, a was still only 17 and a half . i met up with my mates in the naffi bar after release,there all sweating coz a 6 month tour of ireland was coming up,nae need for me tae sweat u had to be 18 to enter service over there..........."unless".....your names alan fuckin watson,the most unluckiest bastard in germany,there was us sat in the bar minding our own buisness when in walks the sargeant" . awrite guys i got a list here for ireland,we quickly ran over,our eyes peering up and down the list"yes!!! am noo on it :-)he then points tae me and says hey watson if my sums are right u would be 18 in august right?aye so a said"...........right come wae me the commanding officer wants you!(fuckkkkk) wit nooa marches ootside his office and the sarg enters telling me tae wait there,5 mins later am called in to see him sat there wae the telephone in his hands"...ah" watson just the man,a got someone on the phone for you"...............so a takes the phone oot his hands ,puts it tae ma ear only to hear ma mums voice in scotland".........awrite son,just had your officer on the phone there ,a hope you enjoy the 6 months in ireland!!!.....wit!!!,a couldnae believe it",she had just signed me up for six months in ireland,wit a bummer,there was me arguing the toss why a canny go ,and hes sat there pishing him self laffing,ure goin he says ,as long as a had ure mums say so.....cheers maw" after a few months northern ireland training it was off to belfast(moscow camp) 1980 a think,what a shit hole",wasnt even aloud out the camp unless a was on a mission,the only good times we had was a saturday night when we had a camp disco,so funny"3 lorries used tae go tae belfast docs tae pic up a load a women and fetch them back intae camp,a had seen some dogs in ma time,but some a these were just pure bow wows,a wasnt touching none a them.a was sat in my room wan sunday when in walks this officer"right am looking for a volounter"watson ull do!.........get some civilian clothes on and go to the armoury and sign out two pistols,geeze was this guy serious....my 1st undercover op :-)..i had to take this officer into armagh,driving a civilian vehicle and armed to the teeth,a had a pistol either side of my chest underneath my jacket. here i am driving this officer through the back streets and country lanes when we came around a sharp bend to find 60 maybe seventy people running around the vehicle,talk aboot crap maself,the officer was like" cam doon watson"cam doon"...........cam doon ma arse,a grabbed a browning 9mm from under ma jacket and cocked the fucker(haha),one round in the chamber a was ready for anything,the officer was nearly begging me tae put it away(shite bag"),minutes later were still driving doon this hill when the officer screams"" its only a bowls game there playing"phewwwww",neadless tae say he never asked me for an escort again.....aldo